facepalm
or face palm, face-palm
[feys-pahm]
Slang.
1. the gesture of placing the palm of one's hand across the face, as to express embarrassment, frustration, disbelief, etc. (often used as an interjection): She read the post and comments and did a facepalm.
Okay, that was dumb—facepalm!
2. to use this gesture to express such emotions.
******************************
“Hey, Jack, come and see what I just did.” Bill said. The pride in his voice was palpable.
Jack was less enthused. He groaned at having to actually move. He still mustered up
the energy to slide off the threadbare couch and see what his roommate was doing.
“Check it out. I just made us a bunch of cash.” Bill said.
“How’d you manage it?” Jack said as he shuffled over the bare floor.
“Okay, so it’s not in my account yet, but it will be pretty soon. Like, a few months,
according to this email.”
Jack stopped. An email that promised money? He had yet to see the message in
question and it already sounded fishy. Dubious even. He moved behind Bill and read. He was
right. The email was definitely a scam.
“Please tell me you aren’t serious.” Jack said.
“I know, right? It’s a sweet deal.”
It sounded great, certainly. It was supposedly from the bank Bill used, and made several
promises. Basically, it said that the bank was having some issues of indeterminate
nature, and needed his help to bail them out. In exchange for a “small” investment of
$1,000, transferred with confirmation of his bank account number, of course, the bank
would, once the problem was fixed, give him twice the money and then put it into an
account with a lush 15 percent monthly interest rate.
The offer was the only thing good about it though. The details put into making it look
authentic were basic at best. The grammar would make a fifth grader cringe. Even the
return address was horribly disguised. In short, it was a scam so obvious even a child
would not fall for it.
“You...you didn’t, did you?”
“Hell yeah I did. I mean, why wouldn’t I? It’s just too good to pass up.”
Jack did something he never thought he would do in his life. He slapped his forehead and
slowly dragged it down to his chin.
“Please, please tell me this is a joke. A horrible, terrible joke.”
“No joke my man. Once the bank deals with this, we’ll have plenty of money. Okay,
maybe it’ll take a few months to build up, but still.”
Jack groaned for a very different reason. “Bill, you got scammed.”
“What? No I didn’t. Trust me, I checked.”
“And how did you check?”
“I called the number, and they said it was legit.”
“I called the number, and they said it was legit.”
“Which number?”
Bill pointed to the email. There was indeed a phone number there. This was met with
another forehead slap.
“You are the single dumbest person I have ever met. Seriously, you are a grade A idiot.”
“What? What’d I do?”
“You called the number on an obvious scam email instead of doing the smart thing and
looking up the bank’s actual number. Hell, you could’ve just driven to the bank and asked
them. But no, you trusted someone who doesn’t even know the difference between there their
and they’re.”
“Okay, smart guy, how about this. You call the bank and they’ll confirm I’m right.” Bill said,
crossing his arms as he did.
“I don’t need to. Think about it. Do you really think a bank, the bank you use mind you,
would ask for your bank account number? The one they could just look up in their systems?
And do you really think they’d go to you for financial aid? Did you think about this at all?”
Bill opened his mouth, but paused before any words left it. He thought for a moment.
Then:
“You know, I was wondering why an Indian guy named Kevin answered the phone.”
********************************************
Always be aware of email scams. You do not want to get caught by one of them. Well, unless you do.
In that case, go nuts.
No comments:
Post a Comment