avouch
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Jack was tired. So tired that just sitting made him want to close his eyes and sleep. He felt it all the way through to his bones. That was what barely sleeping for days did to a man. The only reason he was currently awake was that the chair he was sitting in was rock hard, and the people talking were loud enough that he was constantly being woken up.
He tried to sit up and pay attention, but the subject matter was dull enough that he was zoning out. He knew he should be paying attention, considering it was his life on the line. But all the legalese that was being thrown around had the same effect on him as a sleeping pill. His current exhaustion only made the problem worse. And this had been going on for days. He needed to get this to end. And there was only one way his sleep addled mind could think to do that.
He leaned forward, let out a big yawn and slammed his hand down on the table. The two lawyers nearly jumped out of their seats. Jack took a deep breath.
“You know, this has been going on for a long time. What has it been, a week? Yeah, a week sounds right. And all this arguing about what I did or didn’t do.” He yawned again. This gave the time for his lawyer to speak up.
“Don’t worry about a thing, Jack. This will all be over soon. Just sit back and let me handle everything.”
“Yeah, no. That’s what I’ve been doing, and all that’s gotten me is sleepless nights and a lot of headaches. So yeah, you can shut up and let me talk.”
“Jack, don’t say anything stupid.” His lawyer warned.
“Shut it. I’m going to say what I need to so that this’ll end. I’m going to say the one thing that’ll actually let me get some sleep.” He looked from one lawyer to the other and then said three words. “I did it.”
His lawyer reacted quickly. “Disregard everything my client says. He’s clearly sleep deprived and not in his right mind. Nothing he says here can be construed as a confession or used in court.”
“Well, you’re right about one thing. I am sleep deprived. I’m so damn tired this table is looking real tempting. And yeah, this is probably a huge mistake. But damn it, I need some rest. And right now, it’s looking like the only way to get some is to come clean and do the one thing I was told not to do. Tell the truth. So yeah, this is my confession. I did it. I’m guilty and that’s all there is to it. Case closed, pack it up, we’re done.”
“Jack, don’t do this.” His lawyer said. The man’s skin had gone paler than it normally was.
“Too late.” The other lawyer said, looking much happier, “He already confessed. It’s all been recorded. It can’t be taken back now.”
“Good.” Jack said. “Does that mean we’re done here? Can I go and get some sleep?”
“Yes, I do think we are. Or, at least you are.” The opposing lawyer said. “All that’s left is for us to come to an equitable agreement, which does not require your immediate presence. It is recommended that you be here, so as to not overshoot your financial means, but it isn’t strictly required.”
“Great. In that case, I’m out.” He looked at his lawyer. “Call me later with the details and what I need to do. But not today. I’m going to be sleeping for the rest of the day.”
And with that, he got up and left the room, feeling much better already.
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I have no idea if this is how this kind of legal proceeding works. I've never been to court. Well, I have gotten a few traffic tickets, but that's about it. I imagine it's a lot more complicated than what I have written here though.
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