Word: Sciamachy

 

sciamachy

\ sahy-AM-uh-kee \  , noun;

1. an act or instance of fighting a shadow or an imaginary enemy.

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            “Now, my good man, what’s your name?” 

Why’s he asking that?  Didn’t he already ask, like, five minutes ago?

               “Jason.  Jason Rade.” 

               What?  No.  That’s not my name.  My name is Ted.  Why’d I say that?  Wait a sec.  What was he asking before?  Something about the TV shows I watch, wasn’t it? 

               “And what do you do Jason?”  I’m a student.  Come on, say it. 

               “I’m a cop now, but I used to be in the Special Forces.”  What the?

               What in the world am I saying?  I’m just a college student.  I don’t even want to be a cop or whatever.  Does sound like something I saw on TV pretty recently though.

               “Sounds pretty dangerous.”

               Yes.  Yes it does.  That’s why I’m not…”

               “Yeah, well.  I can take it.”

               Wait, no I can’t.  At least I don’t think I can.  I mean, I’m pretty sure I have a low pain tolerance, right?  Or do I?  I mean, it’s not like I’ve ever tried to see how well I can take a punch.

               “Well, that’s good.  You know why?  ‘Cause I think there’s some terrorists that need to be taken down.”

               What?  Where?  Oh damn, oh damn oh damn, what do I do?  Oh god there they are.  I can see them.  They’re right in front of me.  Oh god, what do I do?  Wait, no they’re not.  I don’t think I see anyone like that.  But I swear they’re standing right in front of me.

               “Well? You’d better take ‘em out, right?”

               I can do that?  Well sure I can.  I mean, I’m a badass cop, right?  Hold on, no I’m not.  I’m a business major.  Or am I?  Well, no time like the present to find out.  Take that you…you…fiend! 

               Oh holy crap, I just hit a guy.  I did just hit a guy, right?  Of course I did.  I mean, it’s not like I hit empty space.  No, that’s ridiculous.  There’s no way I’m swinging at air.  I felt the hit.  Uh oh, I don’t think I knocked him out. 

               Ow!  That hurt!  Oh wait, no it didn’t.  Did it?  I felt it, I think.  But maybe I only think I did?  Urg, I’m getting confused.  Hm, better keep fighting, just to be on the safe side.  Hey, where’d that guy who was asking me questions go? 

               Oh there he is, talking to some other guy.  Why aren’t the terrorists going after any of them?  Meh, probably better not to ask.  I should take them out anyway.  Wait…why am I fighting again?  I don’t think there’s anyone standing in front of me.  But then, there also is?  OW!  He hit me again!  All right, that’s it!  Time to take care of business of real! 

               Oh crap, they got me!  They got me!  The bastards snuck up behind me.  Oh wait, no.  That’s the guy who pointed them out.  Where is he taking me now?  Is he on their side?  No, no can’t be.  The bad guys are staying where they are.  He must be leading me to safety.

               What’s he doing now?  I have no…idea…

               “Ok, what’s your name?”

               “Uh…Ted?”  Yeah, that sounds right. 

               “What’s your job?”

               “I’m a student here.”

               “Ok, you’re good to go.”

               “Ok?  Thanks?”

               Wait a sec… did I just think that I was a character from a TV show?  Wow.  That guy’s good.

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Truth be told, this one is actually partially based on reality.  I was watching a hypnotism show and the hypnotist got one of the volunteers to think he was the protagonist of an action show.  He went and tried to interrogate a broom if I recall correctly.  It was fun to watch.  Of course, I've also once been on the receiving end of a different hypnotist.  I don't remember a lot of it, but remember not thinking much of anything while under though.  I guess it's something you just have to experience for yourself, huh?