Monday, August 31, 2020

Word: Gorp

gorp

[ gawrp ] 
noun Informal.
1.a mixture of nuts, raisins, dried fruits, seeds, or the like eaten as a high-energy snack, as by hikers and climbers.

 

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               Getting transported to a magical world had a lot of advantages. Suddenly being able to use magic was one of them. But it also had a lot of problems. A lack of supermarkets was a big one there. And even bigger problem was no refrigeration, and an oddly low amount of preserved foods. Ryan could not deal with the first two, but he could at least work on the third.

               He was looking at this world’s version of a grape, called a havel. It looked like the berry he knew, but was yellow.  But it did taste good, and would work as a nice proof of concept. He closed his eyes and focused. He felt the water in the small fruit and held his hands out to it. Slowly, the water oozed out of the fruit’s skin, leaving it a shriveled husk, and a small ball of water floating above his hands.

               “What in the world is that?”

               Ryan was almost startled enough to let his magical hold slip, but he regained  control quickly enough to stop anything bad from happening. He turned to look at the speaker. She was a young woman that, on Earth, would be considered one of the most beautiful women alive. Here, she was simply above average in terms of looks (which was something Ryan personally considered one of the best features of this new world).

               “Geeze, Kali, don’t do that.” Ryan said.

               “Sorry, didn’t see you were using magic.” Kali said sheepishly. “Anyway, what are you doing, and what is that thing?”

               “This is a havel that had its water removed.”

               She recoiled in shock. “Why would you do that? Why would you even think about doing that?”

               “Simple. It’ll last a lot longer like this. And I’m going to be using it for something. See, back on my world, they had something called trail mix. It’s a mix of nuts, seeds and dried fruits of different kinds. It’s easy to store, lasts a long time, and is packed with nutrition, so it gives a lot of energy when you eat it. I’m planning on making some.”

               “Your world is so strange.” Kali said. She came further into the room and eyed the dried fruit. “I mean, who would even think to dry up some fruit? Can you even eat it like this?”

               “Sure. It’s the same fruit, just smaller. Here, watch.” He shifted the water, putting it into a nearby cup. Then he popped the dried havel into his mouth. It was tangy and sweet, perfect for what he needed it for.

               Kali looked like she was worried he would keel over at any moment. She only relaxed when it became clear nothing was happening to him.

               “Do you want to try one?” He asked.

               “I…maybe.” She said. Ryan took another fruit from the small pile he had set up and dried one out, handing it his companion. She slowly ate it. Her eyes widened. “It…it tastes like a havel, but stronger. How is that possible?”

               “All the water is taken away, leaving all the stuff that gives it flavor behind. So you’re getting all the taste and none of the filler.”

               “And this will happen with every fruit?”

               “Maybe not in the exact same way, but pretty much, yeah. Want to help out now?”

               “Sure. What should I do?”

               “Get a bunch of fruits, nuts and edible seeds. Start cutting the fruits up into small chunks, then remove the water from them. We’ll either roast or bake the nuts and seeds later. Then once everything’s done, we mix them all together and store them to eat later.”

               “And this, what did you call it, trail mix? It’ll last a long time?”

               “Weeks, maybe even longer.”

               “Amazing. And can you do that with other foods?”

               “Most things, sure. Although the method does differ depending on what you’re making. Like, some things are better for pickling than drying.”

               “What’s pickling?”

               “Have a seat, my friend. The world of preserved foods is vast and deep, and if you want to learn about it, then we have much to talk about.”

              **********************************************

 Trail mix isn't terribly interesting by itself, is it? So I made it a fantasy in the hopes of making things more interesting. Not sure if it worked or not...

Friday, August 28, 2020

Word: Schmaltz


schmaltz

[ shmahlts, shmawlts ]noun
1. Informal. exaggerated sentimentalism, as in music or soap operas.
2. liquid animal fat, especially of a chicken.
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               Jeff watched in horror as his new roommate, Craig, filled the pan with another heaping spoonful of lard. The southern man had already added way too much in Jeff’s opinion, and still more was steadily being added.

               “What are you doing with all that?” Jeff asked.

               “Ain’t that obvious?” Craig said in his thick southern drawl. “I’m gonna be frying up some chicken.”

               “And you need to do that in pure fat?”

               “Sure do. What else would I use?”

               “Vegetable oil?”

               Craig stopped his scooping and looked at Jeff like he had grown a second head.

               “Now why would I ruin good chicken with vegetable oil? Everyone back home knows the only way to fry chicken is in chicken fat.”

               “Wait, that’s…”

               “Yup. Nothing better.”

               “My god, you’re cooking chicken in the chicken’s own grease. That…that sounds wrong somehow.”

               “That’s how you get the best taste.”

               Jeff was not sure. He still thought that cooking oil would be better. Or at least less heart stopping. Craig finished ladeling the lard onto the pan and turned it on. He then went to check on a different pot.

               “Dare I ask?”

               “Mac n’ Cheese, my good man. Just my ma makes.” He checked the pasta and inhaled deeply. “It’ll be done same time as the chicken. That’s a good southern meal right there.”

               “Please tell me you’re at least using skim milk.”

               “Hell no. That’s just water with a fancy name. This needs whole milk.”

               Jeff could feel his arteries clogging at the very thought of what was going to be eaten.

               “Should…should I make a salad or something?”

               Craig turned to look at him with that same second head look. “Do I look like a rabbit to you?”

               “What?”

               “Salad is rabbit food. Are you a rabbit?”

               “Uh, no?”

               “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

               “I am, however, someone who likes his heart to, you know, beat.”

               “Oh please, this stuff won’t kill ya, no matter what them fancy doctors say. I’ve been eating this stuff since I was a kid, and I turned out fine.”

               “Give it a few more years. It’ll catch up to you. I mean, really, you might as well be pouring bacon grease into your arteries.”

               “Oh, right, almost forgot. Thanks for reminding me.”

               “Oh god, you’re not doing what I think you’re doing.”

               Craig got out a large pouch of bacon bits and started adding them to the pot of mac and cheese. Jeff felt the color drain from his face.

               “Oh god, you are.” He said.

               “Now, it ain’t as good as fresh made bacon, but it’ll do in a pinch. I couldn’t find a skillet to cook the strips up proper, so I had to make do.”

               He put the lid on the pot and went back to the pan in which the lard was beginning to melt. Craig nodded and began working with what had to be three chickens, cut into pieces. Jeff watched as he double breaded the meat and then put them into the now melted fat.

               “Now this’ll be some damn fine chicken, if I do say so myself.” Craig said as he listened to the sizzling.

               “I…I…I need to find a cucumber.” Jeff said before rushing out of the apartment.

               Craig shrugged. “Don’t know what got into him. Oh well. More for me.”

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Today for lunch, I had a cheese steak. Then I went out for ice cream. Then I wrote this story. Yay?
Also, I'm pretty sure I've used this word before, haven't I? I think the way I used it was a lot different, so it should be fine.

Wednesday, August 19, 2020

Word: Zhuzh


zhuzh

or zhoosh

[ zhoozh ]
Slang.

verb (used with object)

1. to make (something) more lively and interesting, stylish, or appealing, as by a small change or addition (usually followed by up): These colorful throw pillows are an easy way to zhuzh up your living room.

noun

2. the act of giving something lively interest, style, or appeal, or the fact of having these qualities: Give your hair a quick zhuzh with a pearl clip or a pretty bow. I’ve been told my writing could use a little more zhuzh.

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               Jake stood in front of the full-length mirror, looking at the tux he was decked out in. It looked pretty good to his untrained eye. But he also knew than to jump on it. He had thought the other three looked good as well.

               “So, how about this one?” He asked.

               Ryan hummed and hawed as he considered the suit. “I suppose it’s okay. Better than the others, anyway. But it’s missing something.”

               “Missing something? What’s it missing? A tie?”

               “No, not that. I mean, yeah, you’re definitely going to need a tie, but that’s not what I’m talking about. This needs…something else.”

               “Gonna have to be more specific than that.”

               “I don’t know. It’s just, right now it’s good, but it has the potential to be great. It just needs that little extra something to take it to the next level. Hang on, let me see what they have.”

               Ryan went off in search of the ever elusive something. It still baffled Jake how much the man changed when it came time to get the tuxedo. Even though Ryan was gay, he had not exhibited any of the Hollywood stereotypes that Jake had learned to look for. He was just another guy that happened to date other men. But the moment Jake had asked him if he could help pick out a tux for his wedding, it was like a switch had been flipped. The man had become a fashion expert, jumping from store to store and suit to suit. Each one had been shot down for one reason or another. This was the first that he did not immediately poo-poo.

               “You know, I’m only going to be wearing this one day.” Jake said. “I know it needs to be good, but nobody will say anything if it isn’t 100 percent perfect.”

               Ryan held a number of accessories as he made his way back. “Oh sure, they won’t say anything. They’re all too polite for that. But people talk, you know. Gossip can be a real killer if it gets far enough. Besides, you want to look your best for Julie, right?”

               “Well, I mean, yeah, of course I do.”

               “Well, there you go. Now hold still and let me see what these look like.”

               He began holding the various items up to Jake’s chest and arms, depending on the accessory in questions. Most of them he set on a store provided table, while others he kept on hand. That is, until he held a silver clip to the suit’s breast pocket. This he held there, and then stuck it in. He took a step back and looked the groom-to-be over.

               “There. That’s it. That is the last thing this look needed. Now, now it’s perfect.”

               “Seriously? This tiny little clip?”

               “Look at it with the clip and without it. Trust me, it’s the little things that make all the difference.”

               Jake took his friend’s advice. It was odd, but the clip did indeed make everything more interesting. It just added that little extra splash of color that seemed to tie everything together, without overshadowing the rest of the suit.

               “Okay, fine, you win.” Jake said.

               “Of course I do. Now let’s get this properly fitted and payed for. We’ve still got a lot of shopping to do before you’re really ready.”

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I'm not married, nor have I ever been married, so I don't know the process of picking out a suit for the big day. I imagine it's quite the process though.