Thursday, October 26, 2017

Word: Sawbones

  

sawbones

[saw-bohnz]

noun, plural sawbones, sawboneses. (used with a singular verb) Slang.
1. a surgeon or physician.
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 There was a quiet murmur in the room.  The lack of CO told the officers and detectives that they could talk quietly among themselves until the briefing started.  They did not have much time.  The Sergeant entered the room and all talk ended.  The head of the police department looked around the room for a moment before speaking.
    “Good morning, and thank you all for coming.” He said it like any of them had a choice.  When the Sergeant called a meeting, everyone called had to come.  “In front of each of you, you will find today’s report.”  There was a shuffling of papers as each officer present examined the first page of the report.  Once they saw what they were dealing with, they could not keep quiet.  Sound filled the room as the officers showed their distaste for what they were seeing.
    “Quiet down.” The Sergeant said.  It took a few moments, but the chatter died down.  “As you can all see, we’ve got another Sawbones murder on our hands.” THe briefing room filled with grumbles.  “I know, I know.  I don’t like the name either, but it’s what we were given.  And, given recent information, it is increasingly relevant.
    “The victim today is a Caucasian male, age 27, name Gregory Sampson.  Like the other three, he we found dismembered and dissected.  Reports of the call, time and location of discovery, and other important information can be found in the report.  As unfortunate as this is, it has made us increasingly sure that our killer is a doctor, surgeon, or has high end medical knowledge.”
One of the detectives raised his hand.  The Sergeant nodded his permission for the man to speak.  “What makes you say that?  Sure the cuts are clean, but anyone with the proper tools can do that.”
“There are three reasons.” The Sergeant said.  “One is that these are not just clean cuts.  These are highly precise, and were made along very specific parts of the body.  Each cut actually caused minimal damage, except for those that removed a limb.  Only someone with extensive medical training is likely to be able to perform such dissections.  Second is the state all the victims were in.  None of the victims were healthy.  Take Mr. Sampson here.  He was found with extensive bone fractures in his arms, legs, chest and head.  However, there were signs of at least a week’s worth of recovery, so they are not due to any actions by Sawbones.  All his victims show either a severe injury or disease, although none were immediately deadly.  All the victims were hospitalized within a week of being murdered.  And finally, the cause of death.  All the major wounds shown in the report were done post mortem.  The actual cause of death in all four cases is a cocktail of drugs that are found in hospitals.  Basically, they were medicated to death.  What’s important here are the drugs used.  They are only found in hospitals, and only medical professionals would have easy access to them.  Given these three facts, the likelihood of Sawbones being a doctor is very high, and unless evidence to the contrary shows up, we will operate under this assumption.  Any questions?”
    “Are there any suspects?” Another detective asked.
“As of this moment, no.  Motive is also unknown.  There are working theories, but nothing conclusive.  As of right now, our most likely motive is research.” That got the officers talking again, forcing the Sergeant to quiet them down again.  “Given the fact that the victims were each dissected in different ways, and with all organs accounted for, it seems likely that Sawbones is conducting some kind of illegal medical experiment, although what the purpose of it could be is unknown.  Like with the murderer’s identity, operate under this assumption until better evidence is presented.  Any other questions?”
There were several of them.  Questions about witnesses, about the victims, and others were asked.  But it was not long until the Sergeant had exhausted all his knowledge about the serial killer and his most recent kill.  He held his hands up to silence any further questions.
“I’m afraid that’s all the information I can currently provide.  All officers here will make this case their top priority.  I want you each to find out as much as you can at the crime scene and gather as many suspects and witnesses as you can.  Do everything you need to to catch this killer before he finds a new victim.  Dismissed.”
The officers shuffled out of the briefing room in a semi-orderly manner.  The Sergeant sighed and took another look at the crime report.  His eyes narrowed to slits.  He would see Sawbones arrested, even if he had to do the dirty work himself. 
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Obviously my knowledge of the workings of a police department are limited to what is seen on TV, making what is written here highly inaccurate.  As such, I apologize to any officers of the law who dislike such things.

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