Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Word: Ship

  

ship

[ship] Slang.
noun
1. a romantic relationship between fictional characters, especially one that people discuss, write about, or take an interest in, whether or not the romance actually exists in the original book, show, etc.:
popular ships in fan fiction.
verb (used with or without object), shipped, shipping.
2. to discuss, write about, or take an interest in a romantic relationship between (fictional characters):
I'm shipping for those guys—they would make a great couple!
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 Kelly looked over at her roommate, Sara, who was furiously typing something on her laptop.  The constant clicking of keys made Kelly more curious than annoyed.  After all, Sara usually typed in small, contained bursts, rather than the sustained duration that was currently being presented.  This led Kelly to do the obvious.
    “What’re you writing?” She asked.  
    Sara paused just long enough to look up from the screen.  “Only the best fan fic ever written in the history of fan fics.”
    This got Kelly even more curious.  She pushed herself off the couch and moved behind Sara, reading over the other girl’s shoulder.  After a few minutes of reading, Kelly cringed.  THe story as it was was horrible.  It was not only filled with spelling and grammar problems, the writing was just bad.
    “Uh, Sara…”
    “I know, I know.  Sometimes I amaze myself.” Sara said proudly.
    “This is a first draft, right?”
    “Only in that it’s the first time I’m writing it.  Why?”
    “Wait, does that mean you’re not planning on editing it once you’re done?”
    “Nope.  Why should I?”
    Kelly rubbed the back of her neck.  She hated to do this to her friend, and Sara looked so proud of her work.  But it had to be done.
    “You’re going to want that editing session, trust me.”
    “Why?  It’s perfect.”
    “Sara, it’s terrible.  This is the kind of thing that gets made fun of by everyone else.”
    “Huh?”
    “Now, I’ve only read a little bit of it, so I can’t talk about the entire thing,but let’s start with the basics.  The pairing is just...just wrong.  Now, I won’t say anything about the genders, but they’re mortal enemies who would rather gut each other than anything else.”
    “That’s only because they don’t realize that they’re soulmates.” Sara said dreamily.
    “It...that...that doesn’t make any sense at all.  Seriously, you’re completely ignoring all the established canon.  The characters act nothing like they do in the show, their relationships are all wrong, and there’s nothing of the actual base material left.  You can’t even call this a fan fic anymore.”
    “Oh, like you’re one to talk.  You ship characters all the time in your fics.”
    “Yeah, but I make my ships based on what could happen.  I use the canon to build the world in ways that could theoretically happen.  I keep characters consistent with the source material, relationships make sense and the story fits in with the wider world.  The only thing yours uses from the show is the character’s names and basic appearances.”
Sara looked up at Kelly with a deer-in-the-headlights look.  Everything Kelly had just said seemed to go over Sara’s head.
“But...but...they’d make such a hot couple.”
Kelly sighed.  “It’s not always about how they’d look together.  It’s about chemistry.  Your characters don’t have any in the show.  And what’s worse, they don’t have any chemistry in your story.”
“Well, I think it works.” Sara said with a huff.  “I’m not changing it, just because you think it’s bad.  I bet everyone else will love it.”
“If that’s what you think, I won’t stop you.” Kelly turned to head back to the couch and Sara resumed her typing.  “Although I should point out that your grammar is atrocious.”
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Happy Singles Awareness Day everyone!
Also, there actually is a lot of fan fiction out there like this. It's kind of funny, actually. Just be careful, a lot of it is not child friendly.

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