Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Word: Blinkered




blinkered

[bling-kerd]
adjective
  1. narrow-minded and subjective; unwilling to understand another viewpoint.
  2. having blinkers on; fitted with blinkers.

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               “Hang on, there’s something I’ve got to do.” Chris said.  His girlfriend, Sally saw what he was looking at and let out a quiet groan.
               “You know it’s pointless, right?” She asked.
               “I know, but it’s still fun to see them squirm.”
               “Just…just make it quick, okay?”
               Chris laughed wickedly and hurried off towards his target.  A middle aged man wearing eye catching clothes and holding a large, anti-gay sign, telling the world about how Jesus hated gay people in a very unpleasant way.
               “Hey.” Chris said with a large smile on his face.  The man turned his head to face the newcomer.  “So, uh, you hate gay people, right?”
               “Gays are a blight on this world.” The man said.  His voice was a New England accent, but carried an odd Southern aspect as well, like he came from both the north and south simultaneously.  “Anyone who supports them will burn in Hell.”
               “I see, I see.  And you’re a Christian, I take it?”
               “I am dedicated to the word of our lord and savior, Jesus Christ, yes.”
               “Excellent, wonderful, yes.  So, how’s being a huge hypocrite working out for you?”
               The man’s face scrunched up in confusion.  “What?”
               “Well, it’s just that you’re such a huge hypocrite that it must do wonders for your lifestyle.”
               “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
               “Oh, you know, saying you’re a dedicated Christian while going against it’s core principles and all.”
               “I would never go against the words of the Lord!”
               This was Chris’ favorite part.  He stifled a laugh at what he knew was coming.  He could not wait to see how this man would react.
               “Of course not.  So, you must really like cherries, right?”
               “What?  What do cherries have to do with anything?”
               “Well, you pick them so often that you must love them.”
               “What makes you think I’ve ever picked a cherry in my life?”
               “Sure you have.  If you think you’re a good Christian, you have to practice cherry picking on a nearly daily basis.”
               The man had just caught on.  He sputtered incoherently for a moment.  Chris was thrilled.  This was a good one.  He was going to have a lot of fun with this guy.  “How…how dare you!” The man cried.
               “Hey, I just calls it likes I sees it.  I mean, come on, do you even know what Christianity is all about?”
               “Of course I do.  It’s about accepting the Lord Jesus into your heart and following his word.”
               “And what is his word?”
               “What?”
               “Jesus.  What kind of things did he say?”
               “Well, for one thing, he said gays are the spawn of Satan.”
               “Really?  What section was that?  Because I’m pretty sure Jesus had nothing to do with gay people.”
               “Oh he did.  If you knew the Bible, you’d know that.”
               “You sure about that?  Because I’ve read the Bible.  Multiple times, actually.  How about you?  Have you ever read it?”
               The man looked hesitant for a moment.  “I…I don’t need to read it.  I know it.”
               “What does that even mean?”
               “It means I know it well enough that I don’t need to read it to understand it.”
               Chris had to force himself from laughing.  “You sure?  Because I’m pretty sure Jesus said a lot of things about getting along with other people.  You know, not judging people, forgiving others, and just being all around nice to other people, no matter what.  You know, things like that.”
               The man’s tongue worked around his words.  “You…you…you don’t understand Christ at all!” He roared.  “Christ, our Lord would never accept gays!  They go against everything He has taught us!”
               “Because it says it in the Bible?”
               “Exactly!”
               “You want to know what else the Bible says?  It says slavery is perfectly fine.  It also says that it’s okay to stone people, that shellfish is bad, and that women should completely cover themselves.  Sounds pretty good, huh?”
               “You…you…you’re going to burn for all eternity in the fiery pits of Hell!  There’s a special punishment out there for people like you!  Those who disrespect the word of God and His son will be punished by the worst that both God and Satan can inflict upon your immortal soul!”
               “Yeah, well, can’t be any worse than what you’ll get for going against everything you say you do.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, my girlfriend is waiting for me, so have a nice day.”
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I have the distinct honor of never having met a person like this.  And for that, I am very happy.  I imagine people like this are...frustrating.  

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