eggbeater
[eg-bee-ter]
- a small rotary beater for beating eggs, whipping cream, etc.
- Slang. a helicopter.
******************************
Alex
tore through the living room, looking for his fiancé, Liz. He found her sitting on the couch, reading something
on her phone. Hearing him running around
made her look up slowly, blink a few times then turn back to the book. She idly noticed he was carrying a plastic
bag, but thought nothing of it.
“Honey,
look at this!” He said quickly. He
reached into the bag and pulled out a novelty egg beater. He proudly held the kitchen tool up for her
to see.
“So, what
about it?’
“So? So?
Look at it. Just look at it.”
He moved
in closer so she could get a closer look at the thing. It was shaped vaguely like a helicopter, with
the hand crank acting as the tail rotor, and the main blades running into the
main body, with the handle being the rest of the copter.
“Okay,
it’s a helicopter shaped egg beater. So
what?”
“Really? You don’t get it?” Alex asked with slumped
shoulders.
Liz shrugged. She both marveled and wondered at his ability
to find entertainment in such a thing as a novelty kitchen tool that they would
probably never use.
“It’s an
egg beater!” He said excitedly, as it that said anything. Liz looked at him blankly, hoping for an
explanation that never came.
“Yeah, I
can tell. So what?”
“It’s an
egg beater shaped like an egg beater.”
Liz
blinked in confusion. “Uh, Alex, that
would just be a normal egg beater.”
“Oh come
on, you seriously don’t get it?”
“What’s
there to get?”
“An egg
beater is also another name for a helicopter.”
Liz
looked at him, now even more confused. “What? That can’t be right. I mean, why would anyone call a helicopter an
egg beater? It doesn’t make any sense.”
“It’s
true. Look it up if you don’t believe
me.”
Liz
closed her book and began her search. It
did not take long for her to find that Alex was, inexplicably, correct.
“Huh.” She
said simply.
“You get
it now, right? Why this is so amazing.” Alex said, holding out the beater.
“I guess
it makes a bit more sense. Kind of. I mean, as much as this ever can when the
underlying premise is so ridiculous.”
“Oh, it’s
hilarious, and you know it.”
“Not
really. I guess it’s slightly
entertaining, but not hilarious. Still,
I guess it’s a good conversation starter.”
“Good
enough. I’m going to go put this on the
counter.”
Alex ran
off to do just that. He did not give Liz
enough time to say anything to keep him from putting it somewhere
prominent. She lay back and grumbled at
his choice of décor. She would have to
go in later and put it somewhere a bit more discrete.
She lay
back on the couch and started to read more.
Her mind started to wander back to the egg beater though. And the more she thought about it, the more
she came to a single conclusion.
“Huh. I guess it is kind of funny.”
*********************************
Now I'm wondering if something like this actually exists. I didn't see any, but I also didn't look very hard. And if it doesn't exist, someone should make one. I don't think I would buy it, but someone would.
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